Undressing Rubin's diagram of sexual hierachy
Touch me right here...
Gayle Rubin is an American anthropologist who researches sexuality and gender.
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
In the early 1980s she described how societies tend to think about sexual activity in hierarchical ways, with some forms of sex seen as morally preferable to others.
Married
Promiscuous
Hetrosexual
With manufactured objects
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Non-procreative
Procreative
No pornography
Pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
For money
In the park
She drew a diagram called the ‘'charmed circle’ as part of this analysis (Rubin, 1984).
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
The inner "charmed" circle
Married
Hetrosexual
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Procreative
No pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
She placed the types of sexual activities that are usually treated as ‘good, normal, natural and blessed’ in the centre of the charmed circle.
The outer limits
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
Sex in older age...
Promiscuous
With manufactured objects
Non-procreative
Pornography
For money
In the park
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
The types of sexual activity that she argued are usually treated as ‘bad, abnormal, unnatural, damned’ she placed in the ‘outer limits’ of the diagram.
Select a segment to find out more...
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
Promiscuous
Married
Hetrosexual
With manufactured objects
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Non-procreative
Procreative
No pornography
Pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
For money
In the park
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
Different people draw their own personal charmed circle differently. What some people think is ‘outer limits’ other people think is good ordinary sex. But whilst making judgements about ‘good’ and ‘bad’ types of sex is very common, it can be useful and interesting to reflect on your own views and experiences. Sexual hierarchies change over history, often in relation to the introduction of new technologies, Viagra being a case in point. The charmed circle may look very different in a few generations time. As attitudes continue to shift, and new practices emerge, who knows what it might include in the future?
References
Non-procreative | procreative
The acceptance of pleasure
However, Viagra perpetuated the idea that sex should involve penetration, so it did not help to create space for other forms of sexual activity.
Rubin placed procreative sex in the charmed circle and non-procreative sex outside it. Today sex for pleasure alone is valued highly by many people and same-sex sexual activity is much more culturally visible and accepted. Feminist and LGBTQ+ movements and the marketisation of the contraceptive pill brought about much of this change (Keating 2020; Wallhead, 2023). Viagra also helped by normalising non-reproductive sex, through making sex more accessible to older and infertile heterosexual couples.
S&M | Vanilla
Changing views of kinkiness
Interestingly, researchers have shown that people still make distinctions between good and bad forms of kinky sex. One researcher has redrawn the charmed circle to show how people attending a ‘sexpo’ retail event characterised ‘respectable raunch’ (Mulholland, 2011).
Since Rubin was writing, forms of sex that involve consensual power play – kink and BDSM in modern terminology, ‘S/M’ in Rubin’s original charmed circle – have become more acceptable among some groups. Some people call this the ‘Shades of Grey’ effect due to the popularity of this book series, although many kinksters consider it to be a very problematic representation of their sexual practices because consent is not clear (Barker, 2013).
Rubin was generalising and writing from the perspective of the 1980s. But you can also use the charmed circle to think about the ways sexual activity is judged for different types of people, and how what is valued changes over time. Older people’s sexual activity is often seen as problematic or unsuitable – the stereotype of a ‘dirty old man’ – but researchers think that the introduction of Viagra is changing this. Nowadays there can even be pressure on older people to stay sexually active as part of ageing healthily, which isn’t always welcome (Jones, 2020).
Objects | Bodies
Manufactured help
Rubin argued that sex that only involves bodies is usually seen as preferable to sex that involves manufactured objects, such as sex toys. While Rubin wasn’t thinking of pharmaceutical interventions like Viagra, it is a manufactured addition to ‘bodies only’ which can mean that some people don’t want to use it because they see it as unnatural – one of the characteristics of ‘outer limits’ sex.
References
- Barker, M. (2013). Consent is a grey area? A comparison of understandings of consent in Fifty Shades of Grey and on the BDSM blogosphere. Sexualities, 16(8), 896-914. doi:10.1177/1363460713508881
- Keating, A., 2020. The History of the Birth Control Pill. Journal of Undergraduate Social Work Research 4, 13–23.
- Jones, R. L. (2020) ‘Later Life Sex and Rubin’s “Charmed Circle”’ Sexuality & Culture 24 pp. 1480–1498. https://doi.org/10.1007/s12119-020-09708-6
Mulholland, M. (2011). When porno meets heterosexpo: Heteronormativity and the pornification of the mainstream. Australian Feminist Studies, 26(67), 119-135.
- Rubin, G. S. (1984). Thinking sex: Notes for a radical theory of the politics of sexuality In C. S. Vance (Ed.), Pleasure and danger: Exploring female sexuality (pp. 267-319). Boston: Routledge and Kegan Paul.
- van den Hoonaard, D. K. (2001). The Widowed Self: The Older Woman's Journey Through Widowhood. Waterloo, Ontario: Wilfrid Laurier University Press.
Wallhead, E., 2023. A Political Sexual Revolution: Sexual Autonomy in the British Women’s Liberation Movement in the 1970s and 1980s. Twentieth Century British History 34, 354–376. https://doi.org/10.1093/tcbh/hwad026
Married | In sin
Shifting attitudes to sex and marriage
split inheritance with a second spouse. Others feel that it would be disrespectful to their deceased spouse to remarry (van den Hoonaard, 2001). In this situation, older people sometimes ‘reverse the spokes’ of the charmed circle, by treating sex outside marriage as morally preferable to sex within remarrying.
On the original charmed circle ‘married’ sex is within the charmed circle and ‘in sin’ (sex outside marriage) is in the outer limits. Attitudes to sex outside marriage have got more permissive since Rubin first drew the circle, and this includes older people re-partnering in later life. When people form new relationships in later life, perhaps after the death of a spouse, they often choose not to remarry. Some feel it would be unfair to their adult children to ‘replace’ the dead parent or
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Transcript
Undressing Rubin's diagram of sexual hierachy
Touch me right here...
Gayle Rubin is an American anthropologist who researches sexuality and gender.
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
In the early 1980s she described how societies tend to think about sexual activity in hierarchical ways, with some forms of sex seen as morally preferable to others.
Married
Promiscuous
Hetrosexual
With manufactured objects
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Non-procreative
Procreative
No pornography
Pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
For money
In the park
She drew a diagram called the ‘'charmed circle’ as part of this analysis (Rubin, 1984).
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
The inner "charmed" circle
Married
Hetrosexual
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Procreative
No pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
She placed the types of sexual activities that are usually treated as ‘good, normal, natural and blessed’ in the centre of the charmed circle.
The outer limits
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
Sex in older age...
Promiscuous
With manufactured objects
Non-procreative
Pornography
For money
In the park
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
The types of sexual activity that she argued are usually treated as ‘bad, abnormal, unnatural, damned’ she placed in the ‘outer limits’ of the diagram.
Select a segment to find out more...
In sin
Homosexual
S/M
Promiscuous
Married
Hetrosexual
With manufactured objects
Vanilla
Monogamous
Bodies only
Non-procreative
Procreative
No pornography
Pornography
Free
At home
Coupled
In a relationship
Same generation
For money
In the park
Alone or in groups
Cross-generational
Casual
Different people draw their own personal charmed circle differently. What some people think is ‘outer limits’ other people think is good ordinary sex. But whilst making judgements about ‘good’ and ‘bad’ types of sex is very common, it can be useful and interesting to reflect on your own views and experiences. Sexual hierarchies change over history, often in relation to the introduction of new technologies, Viagra being a case in point. The charmed circle may look very different in a few generations time. As attitudes continue to shift, and new practices emerge, who knows what it might include in the future?
References
Non-procreative | procreative
The acceptance of pleasure
However, Viagra perpetuated the idea that sex should involve penetration, so it did not help to create space for other forms of sexual activity.
Rubin placed procreative sex in the charmed circle and non-procreative sex outside it. Today sex for pleasure alone is valued highly by many people and same-sex sexual activity is much more culturally visible and accepted. Feminist and LGBTQ+ movements and the marketisation of the contraceptive pill brought about much of this change (Keating 2020; Wallhead, 2023). Viagra also helped by normalising non-reproductive sex, through making sex more accessible to older and infertile heterosexual couples.
S&M | Vanilla
Changing views of kinkiness
Interestingly, researchers have shown that people still make distinctions between good and bad forms of kinky sex. One researcher has redrawn the charmed circle to show how people attending a ‘sexpo’ retail event characterised ‘respectable raunch’ (Mulholland, 2011).
Since Rubin was writing, forms of sex that involve consensual power play – kink and BDSM in modern terminology, ‘S/M’ in Rubin’s original charmed circle – have become more acceptable among some groups. Some people call this the ‘Shades of Grey’ effect due to the popularity of this book series, although many kinksters consider it to be a very problematic representation of their sexual practices because consent is not clear (Barker, 2013).
Rubin was generalising and writing from the perspective of the 1980s. But you can also use the charmed circle to think about the ways sexual activity is judged for different types of people, and how what is valued changes over time. Older people’s sexual activity is often seen as problematic or unsuitable – the stereotype of a ‘dirty old man’ – but researchers think that the introduction of Viagra is changing this. Nowadays there can even be pressure on older people to stay sexually active as part of ageing healthily, which isn’t always welcome (Jones, 2020).
Objects | Bodies
Manufactured help
Rubin argued that sex that only involves bodies is usually seen as preferable to sex that involves manufactured objects, such as sex toys. While Rubin wasn’t thinking of pharmaceutical interventions like Viagra, it is a manufactured addition to ‘bodies only’ which can mean that some people don’t want to use it because they see it as unnatural – one of the characteristics of ‘outer limits’ sex.
References
Married | In sin
Shifting attitudes to sex and marriage
split inheritance with a second spouse. Others feel that it would be disrespectful to their deceased spouse to remarry (van den Hoonaard, 2001). In this situation, older people sometimes ‘reverse the spokes’ of the charmed circle, by treating sex outside marriage as morally preferable to sex within remarrying.
On the original charmed circle ‘married’ sex is within the charmed circle and ‘in sin’ (sex outside marriage) is in the outer limits. Attitudes to sex outside marriage have got more permissive since Rubin first drew the circle, and this includes older people re-partnering in later life. When people form new relationships in later life, perhaps after the death of a spouse, they often choose not to remarry. Some feel it would be unfair to their adult children to ‘replace’ the dead parent or